Monthly Archives: April 2010

>April ain’t over yet

>And before it is, I must tell you what a great birthday I had. Amid all the whining and dining, I forgot to tell you all about it. You know, I love to live it up, and if anything my birthdays are proof of that. And 30 is a good age to start living it up, if I’m not already, wouldn’t you say? So there, I said it – the big 3-Oh! And believe me, it feels nothing like it sounds.

But coming back to the party, remember we did a Red Carpet Awards Night last year on my birthday? Well, this was Part 2. In Lucknow, of course! And while last year it was me and my friends who put the show together, this year it was just my friends – god bless them! So while I was away working my a$$ off in Delhi, they were brainstorming in Lucknow, trying to be funny and witty and succeeding at it all!
And like I was saying – we believe in totally living it! So there were spotlights and a red carpet, fake paparazzi, wine and shine! And we had fake dollars printed with my picture on them (I know, I know that sounds terribly narcisstic but it was so much fun!) that the guests could use to bid for some priceless possessions during the auction. Oh, I forgot to tell you about the auction – “for a good cause, of course!” And what was being auctioned? Stuff that’s characteristic of people among our friend circle – like red shirt for a guy who’s usually in red, pearls for a friend who’s always loaded and my gown from my last birthday! Over the top, eh? But such crazy fun, I can’t begin to tell you!
And the awards were as witty as they can get. Cheeky too. And very naughty. Like this one to a guy who spends all his time on FB – Most Likely to Buy Property on Facebook! And this one for a yoga crazy guy who keeps cracking suggestive jokes – Ramdev Baba award for perfecting Asana No. 69! And another one for a guy who rarely turns up at parties – Mr. India, the play being on the invisible part. And lots more.
And you want to know what I wore? A red, knee length strapless dress that showed off my shoulders all too well! I scouted high and low for it in Delhi and trust me, when I found it I knew it was a steal. Everyone loved the red on me. I wish I could show you guys what it looked like, but would you believe it, I have not a single picture of me in my outfit in which I’m not cosying up to The Guy?

And lest you think The Guy had no role to play in my party, let me point out everything he did for me on my birthday. I mean, he did EVERYTHING – right from taking care of all the arrangements to entertaining the guests while his wife was having glass after glass of her favourite wine, to making sure I didn’t plonk on the grass in the garden and ruin my dress to helping me change into my night clothes because I was too “happy” to manage even that and to finally tucking me into bed before he wrapped up things! Ah, the joys of a having a husband who’s as much in love with you as you with him!

Aaaand he bought me an awesome gift. Which I can show you:

Go drool!

>Single in the City

>How does a girl sitting down alone at a table in a restaurant look? Like me?

Two months of living alone in Delhi means I must come to terms with what people must think of me when I enter an eating place alone. And when I sit down in a crowded place and eat by myself. It means I must get used to the stares – inquisitive, judgmental, amused. Sometimes, people look at me for a little longer than is polite, probably trying to guess why a girl should be out for dinner alone; I stare back at them blankly, just to make them realise I’m not up for scrutiny. Sometimes, they stare long enough at the back of my head to make me want to get up and go away; but I never do.

I just sit there, intent on having fun, even if I’m alone. Sometimes I try so hard to do it, I could cry. Sometimes, I just focus on silencing my growling stomach and make those stares melt away. It makes things easier, but rarely enjoyable.

My Blackberry gives me company when I’m eating out alone. It never asks me questions, never leaves me alone to fight perceptions. It lends me a look of not being alone in this world, of perhaps being busy, conveys to the curious eye that I have friends and family who would take me out under different circumstances.

Sometimes people are nice enough to not send as much as a second glance my way. And that makes me feel at ease – as if it were the most normal thing for a girl living in a big city to just get up and go out for a meal all by herself! It seems like it should be, if it isn’t anyway!

I could almost love my solitude if people were better at pretending that it’s okay for a girl to be sitting alone at a quiet table in a crowded restaurant. But because they suck at this so, I end up a little more lonely than I should.

>Question of the Month: April

>If you could name yourself after a month, which one would it be and why?

I’d call myself April – the month that’s spring in one part of the world, end of winter in another and beginning of summer in still another. And because it feels nice on the tongue – April.

>Yeh Dilli Hai Meri Jaan

>Okay, so where do I begin? It’s almost like I’ve lost you. And I don’t want to. And if it makes any difference, I’d add I think about you all the time, dear reader.

I think about what all I should tell you that would not be work-related and that would not be I-miss-XYZ-related. And on most days I draw a blank. Believe me, I have so many blog drafts in my head, but no time to write them down. Time is really a problem.

But Delhi does this to you, doesn’t it? It gobbles up all your space like you could exist in a vacuum. It gobbles up a lot of other things as well. Like that little place in your heart which makes you remember people, call them, meet them. Because you have no time for it. After a 12-hour work day, what’s really left of life to talk about?

Were you waiting for this – the time I’d start cribbing about life in Delhi? Because I am going to begin now. It’s getting a little lonely in here, on days when I have the time to feel lonely. I welcome work with open arms because I do not want to be devoured by the ugly head that rears itself from time to time to drive in the point that I am alone here. I miss my life back home, but I’m at a place where I’m prepared to do this (what would you call it – torture?) to myself for a little bit longer. Because frankly, I love my work. And for all those horrible things that it is, I love Delhi too. I always have, I just wasn’t ready to admit it until now.

Of course, there are good things still happening. For one, being off 24hour FBing, bogging and Tweeting means I spend more time reading. I spend more time soaking in all that this city has to offer, the loneliness included. It may be a tad presumptuous even for me to say this about myself, but I feel like there’s a book growing within me. I feel the adjectives, verbs and phrases I find for everything around me falling over each other to burst out of my head. There’s still no story though, just aimless words. And I don’t know if they’ll find a suitable place to go.

I let myself get lost in a crowd. And I realise I can never get lost in a crowd. I know I will always stand out. Because in my head, that’s how I see myself – a little less ordinary.

On a lighter note, I’m still living it up. I attended a post-IPL party and did I tell you it was a whole new experience? We – The Guy was in town last weekend – went for the IPL match too and if you think it’s about cricket, you’re so wrong! It was a party at the stadium! We also went for the grand finale of the fashion week in Delhi and attended the pre-show party there. I’m not a star struck, celeb stalker. But to be at the same party as ten well-known designers makes small-town me feels nice-ish. Of course, this whole exercise of telling you what all I did could be seen as entirely small-townish, but believe me, if I had to show off, I could do some more name dropping here. So no, this isn’t about flaunting, it’s just about telling you about the fun bits. About how much we love the good life!

There’s so much more I want to write: about how my birthday month is here and I’m not feeling it, though I’ve already received my first birthday present! I want to write about how I cry into the pillow at night because I hate sleeping alone and I want to write about how heightened my olfactory senses have been since I came to Delhi, but another day.

That’s all about me for now. How have you been doing? Tell me so that I know you’re still here.