> I’ve been busy attending the wedding of a friend who’s visibly and madly in love with the girl he found for himself some years back. I caught the lovelorn groom look at his beautiful bride with so much more than love, I felt embarassed I’d intruded on that moment. The same day, a totally out-of-love couple around me was celebrating (probably just observing, because there seemed a lot of reluctance to celebrate anything there) their 35th wedding anniversary. And I looked at both of them, the two sets of couple, and wondered what the older one would have been like 35 years ago and what the younger one would be like so many years hence…
Because marriage has a way of changing the way we love. Of course, I’d like to believe that time strengthens the bond two people share. Setting up a home together, having children, bringing them up, quarelling, arguing and then making up would bring any two people closer. But I’ve seen too many couples having done all of that, still looking for a reason why they should be together. They live in loveless marriages for too long, sometimes forever because they once loved the person they’re married to.
It’s a scary prospect – falling in love and then spending the most part of your life wishing there was some reason left to continue loving that person. Worse still, wishing that your partner would love you again the way he/she once did. Why do people continue being part of a marriage that looks for lame excuses to survive? Why do people stop loving the very same people they were inseparable from?
I’m not looking for answers, because I know there are complicated stories behind such unhappy marriages. But I am looking for a happy ending to my love story. I looked at the 35-year-old sham of a wedding and then looked at my husband. And we promised we’d never do this to each other.